Keyboard Symphony

I am rather musically un-inclined; I wouldn’t be able to carry a note even if I had a forklift. Musical terminology whizzes way above my head, to me the closest thing to a concerto would be a mass produced ice-cream cone, ‘A’ minor is one who is still under the sapling age of eighteen, and a conductor is nothing more than the crank selling bus tickets in the over crowded BEST buses. So now since the evidence has been presented, I am sure that there would be little opposition to the fact that I know squat about music. However this did not deter me from writing my own symphony.

2 am an unearthly time for me to be awake, as I was desperately coaxing myself to sleep, odd sounds kept meandering into my mind. All I could hear was the hum of fingers tapping away furiously on a keyboard interspersed with the timely click of the mouse. Soon this cacophony took shape and began to sound quite melodious – and voila the keyboard symphony was born. I made several attempts to peel myself off the pillow and write it down, but due to my sleep induced paralysis I could barely lift my head. So instead my mind raced ahead and jotted it all down in my mind to be reviewed by me in the morning when I was a little more conscious.

High noon, have a few vague memories of the so called symphony, two words were all the remnants of last nights escapade, the rest is a complete reconstruction – so bear with me as I present to you the Keyboard Symphony…

Fingers are poised in eager anticipation over the keyboard; the keys are waiting to compose sweet music. The infra red of the mouse flickers a bit in and then suddenly it all begins.

It starts of with a few taps of the alphabets a tappity tap, tippity tap tappitytippity tap followed by a mouse solo, a beautiful rendition of clicks backed up with the beat of the enter key.

Then the typing gains momentum, the tippity tap becomes faster…the rhythm is set by Ctrl C Ctrl X Ctrl V…the space bar provides the occasional pep to the symphony…soon all the keys are utilised, fingers caress all the keys, F2, F7 no key is spared…together they weave an orchestral wonder….then suddenly silence…

The computer has hung; an air of apprehension permeates the air…

The soft sound of esc pressed thrice breaks the silence, then the tapping becomes louder and the finger pound the keyboard. TAPPITY TAP TIPPITY TAPPITY TAP, the symphony begins to crescendo here…

CTRL ALT DEL
CTRL ALT DEL
CTRL ALT DEL

The computer reboots…the symphony ends…applause resonates in the hall...

Blog soul searching...

There are loads of things to write about, but somehow when I actually sit down to write something for this godforsaken blog, absolutely nothing comes to mind. So after about two hundred and twenty three attempts of making a path breaking blog post, realisation dawned upon me! If one was to read my blog (I mean I know no one wants, but in the freak case that someone does chance upon it and makes the mistake of reading it), they would realise that the blog has absolutely nothing of consequence on it! No substance, no depth, no meaning. So I have resolved to give my blog a sense of purpose, an identity! From now on the blog is no longer random ramblings of a nearly deranged mind. It shall contain something all three of my extremely bored readers can relate to. Posts will now contain rantings about the narmada bachao andolan or the mahajan shooting. On second thoughts, maybe I should continue writing about the inconsequential happenings in my life and the arbid thoughts that make their way into this little used mind. As purposeless and futile as it might be – it’s my blog and I shall do what I please with it…muahahahahaha! So till the next post (which will be quite soon, since I have reclaimed my status of having no life), cheers!

The Armchair

The creak of the door broke the silence. The silence had been deafening, it was driving him insane, but he did nothing about it. There wasn’t much he could have done. He just sat there draped over the armchair, motionless and limp. The armchair stood near the window, with its back facing the door. It desperately needed to be repaired, tattered at the arms, torn and stained almost everywhere else. It was too big for him, it engulfed him completely. Made him look even frailer than he actually was. All strength had left him. When he sat in that chair, he may have looked weak, but that is probably the only time he felt strong. It is the only time he felt he was invincible. Every time he sat in the chair the same images would come to his mind. They would play on endlessly. At first they were hazy and barely had any form – flashes off white, a clang of metal, smears of red, that’s all. Soon they took form; the sounds became clearer the flashes became a woman clad in a white uniform. The clatter of metal was now accompanied by the shrieks of a woman and maniacal male laughter. He could see the gashes made by the knife; he could see the blood running down her leg. He could feel her flesh and taste the tang of her blood. It was all very real. It was little too real, he could see life drain out of her, her limp body weighed down on his hand. As she grew weaker, he grew stronger. The images were becoming more vivid with every passing second. As the images became sharper, time inched by, the moon rose overhead and cast just enough light to illuminate his wrinkled face. The moonlight ignited the gleam in his eye which in turn flooded the entire room. His lips slowly curled upward in a wry smile, he gripped the armchair. The creak of the door broke the silence. The nurse walked in with his medicines. He knew what he had to do.

.....

Twenty one years and no change
Nothing has changed
All my life I have had them
Surrounding me, standing by me
My strength, my support, my family
Every scribble was art
Every word uttered poetry
They believed in me
Too bad they were the only ones
It happened a while ago
The world they had built up for me
Came crashing down
Reality had struck me hard
I was surrounded by the rubble of my reality
Piece by piece I re built my world
It will never match up it
To the world they had created for me
I stand here alone
I know what I’m capable of
They think they know my potential
The disparity between the two – vast
So now I am left to grapple with the harsh truth alone
Only I know my dirty secret
I am not half the person they think I am
But I can’t let them know that
I can just never let them know

The Wrong Road

I have reached the fork in the road. It’s the time to make a choice. I can see a path in front of me; I can’t take the first step on my journey. Maybe it’s because I am petrified of where it might take me. Maybe it’s because I know once I take this path, I have no choice but to keep walking. Or worst of all maybe because I know it’s the wrong path. I know I am not meant to be here. It’s not my place. I know it, I can feel it. But I see no other paths available. I see nothing but dead ends. I have to take the wrong road. A force compels me to travel. It’s what I have to do and that’s all I know. So I walk down this wrong road, in the hope that it takes me to the right place. The place where I am meant to be. The place I keep visiting in my mind. The place called happiness. I see happiness in shades of bright blue and white swirls. I feel happiness in a cool summer breeze carrying with it the tang of oranges. It’s where I need to be, even if it means I have to travel the wrong road to get there.