The Curse of Mediocrity

I think I am cursed. It is the curse of mediocrity.
I would rather be terrible at something then mediocre.
Ordinary acts are forgotten, they just fade into oblivion.
Sometimes mediocre is all you can get, ordinary is all you are.
The worst part however, is not being forgotten.
It’s that maddening feeling which corrodes you mentally,
every time you feel you are about to break that barrier.
Cross that line which divides the average from the brilliant.
There are times when brilliance is staring right at you.
You reach out to it, you can almost touch it.
You try and try and try, but you never do.
Frustration begins to consume your very being.
You try to fight it but you can’t.
Soon, frustration wins and takes over.
That’s when you accept mediocrity
and never come near brilliance again.

Why bother??

I was a dreamer. I used to think that was a good thing. I was always that all great things begin with a dream. With that thought in my heart I allowed myself to continue to dream. I dreamt up all sorts of wonderful events. This made me realise that life offers endless opportunities and if you really want them badly enough you can achieve whatever you set your mind to. Now this is where my problem begins. I don’t want anything that badly, I don’t believe in anything passionately enough; I have no goal for which I am willing to sacrifice my all. I am not motivated by anything; I am not driven by any kind of force. No inspiration, no inclination, no motivation…so why bother to dream!

The Saga Begins

Those of you who read my blog (yes all three of you) will be verry happy to know that i will no longer be posting any more inane movement manifestos on my blog. You will be glad that the escapades of bhatavdekar and rithambara are no longer goin to grace my blog - they have found a new home. A place meant solely for them,

www.unstable-minds.blogspot.com/

The Movement?

Bhatavdekar and Rithamabara the movement? A comment from bhatavdevkar of bhatavdekar and rithambara fame, suggestin that we start a movement, somethin on the lines of the beat mvmt or like dadaism - this once again got me thinkin of the possibilty of startin a mvmt! actually recently (thanks to these blasted exams) it dsnt take much for me to begin thinkin about obscure things like this when i shld be focusing a little more of my attention on the all important exams! Any way now that i have deviated enough it is time for me to get back to discussing our future movement! Several hours were spent on the kind of movemnet it shld be, reformist, revolutionarty? what are cause shld be? whether we shld wear superhero like leotards and dash across the city spreadin our yet to be decided to message?

then finally we hit upon it, Bhatavdekar would have a large 'B' on her costume, i(rithambara) would have a large 'R' on mine and then we wld con some unsuspectin fool to wear an 'A', after rechristenin the poor soul somethin equally (if not more) ridiculous (any volunteers??) Together we would be part of the B - R - A movement, campaigin for the right for movement! Its time to do away with these restrictions, why shld we be strapped down by society in this ruthless manner! In due course the manifesto will take form, the logo shall be designed and the movement shall grow...sign up now, before we forget all about it!

Disclaimer: The views expressed in the above post are the rantings on an extremely unstable mind, which in five yrs time wld probably need severe institutional help, so till then pls do not give much importance to the inane chatter which goes on in the unstable mind, which rithamabara insists on postin on the blog - no sentiments were meant to be hurt durin the makin of this post, all characters are purely fictitious and exist only in the deep depths of this unstable mind. Thank thee!

Fraandships!

this post is a result of a small online conversation i had with this friend of mine. in the course of our conversation he harmlessly asked whether i was 'excited' about valentines day. Now please note those of u who dnt know me, you shld kno that not only am i very much single but absolutely detest the concept of this over commercialised and over hyped day! so after my frnd asked what he thought was a seemingly innocent question i went on about how in my very strong opinion that this day had very little significance in my life and hence there was nothin much to get excited about! in response to this, either to calm me down or to irritate me more ( i think its the latter) he went on to tell me how i never knew what was in store, it was quite likely that someone would come up to me in college and tell me that hes been admiring me for the past two years. This got me thinkin, if ever on valentines day (or any other day for that matter) some arbid random boy comes up to me and tells me that hes been 'admiring' me for the past TWO years and that he wants to makes fraandships with me, i wld firstly run away as fast as my little feet can carry me and more importantly you can be sure of that im probably goin to detest valentines day even more than i do now...!

Ofcourse

i cant spell
punctuation has no meanin
thoughts do not flow
'ofcourse' peppers the whole write up
guess that book will have to wait

The Chronicles of Bhatavdekar and Rithambara

That my friends is the title of my first book. dont worry i am not goin to venture on this suicide mission on my own, me and this moronic frnd of mine (moronic bcoz she wld have to be pretty supid to write a book in collaboration with me!!!) have decided to write a book in the form of various telephonc conversations with eachother. she will be called dulandhar bhatavdekar and me - ma prem rithambara (i am still reelin from the mild heart attack i got when i read this womans name in the newspaper - yes someone is actually named that!!)...
anyway our conversations would be extremely rude, totally politically incorrect and ofcourse side spittingly funny. this ofcourse would mean that our book would be banned in most countries, but would thrive in the gray market - we would both be ex-communicated from our respective religions and families and some fanatical group would probably issue a fatwa or somethin like close to that - however the millions we make should keep us happy. though we would but obviously be scarred by the emotional trauma we go through in the process (the millions would help at this point) - we shall channelise it and use it to write our next book - from prison ofcourse...so ladies and gentlemen - in the summer of 2007 please dont forget to pick up your own copy of the chronicles pf bhatavdekar and rithambara...

Darkness...

Not even the slightest hint of light
Darkness everywhere you look
In the distance you hear sweet humming
The humming of a girl no older than four
You walk towards the humming
The lilting music guides you to her
You can now hear your own footsteps
But you still see nothing

Minutes pass
Your pace quickens
The humming gets nearer
Sweat starts to trickle down your face
Tears stream down your face
You can feel the cold
But you still see nothing

The humming now melts into the babbling of a rivulet
Water flows by your hand
A breeze caresses your face
Mud is pressed between your toes
A sudden calm has set
You still see nothing

The water turns warm
The breeze dry and scorching
The mud burns the soles of your feet
The temperature rises
You soon feel nothing but the searing heat
Suddenly you see a light

The light gets brighter
The surrounding get hotter
The light is now blinding
You clench eyes shut praying it will go away
When you open them it has
There is darkness everywhere you look
In the distance you can hear faint humming
But you see nothing

Dream...

Dream

It starts with a wonder

Then it grows with possibility

Illusions spiral higher

Expectations rise

Then it all comes crashing down

That’s where reality lies

correction

did i say one whole sentence? i obviously meant seven words masquerading as a three sentence even though rules of syntax would forbid it! so technically there isnt even one WHOLE sentence, damn u syntax - damn u!

blog??

i have a blog? was doin some general surfing online (main aim was to avoid studyin for the too close for comfort exams) and i realised i had a blog. i was also quite amused to see i had actually posted ONE WHOLE SENTENCE on it! so have decided to take the iniative and write some more, or atleast write somethin! so this time i hope not to forget, will generally write - im probably the first 'blogger' who is ever goin to say this, but this blog is really not gonna keep u entertained much, its goin to be rambling abt life and how the universe is out to get me - so if ur life is as dull as mine then please come and read my blog - but it case u actually have a somethin remotely close to that thing pple call a life - go enjoy and live - dnt waste time on my blog!!!

PS. This and post titled 'correction' were mysteriously deleted from my blog...i told u the universe is out to get me

i give up!

i hate technology
a man made hell
we give all we have
serenade the comp
dedicate our lives to it
then in repayment
it re boots

Hunan Chicken and Chapatti

one really does strange things for family. things they never would have ever imagined doin otherwise. i dnt think its love that makes us do these incredibly idiotic acts - i am still in the process of figurin out why we do the silly things we do..
maybe its to avoid argument, maybe its for the 21 years u have lived with eachother, maybe u jst cnt say no to those misty eyes lookin back at u...there is some kind of force which compels you to do these things - well maybe not, whatever it is - it made me eat hunan chicken and chapatti for lunch - id do anythin for those misty eyes, so i guess hunan chicken and chapatti isnt all that bad...